Skool is always open @ the barber shop

Ok, I'm sure that Ice Cube has educated those of you who don't ever or even regularly enter "black barber shops". You should all have a decent idea of what goes on in regards to jokes and conversation. Here is an excerpt of what went down last Saturday.

The only real name I'll use is that of the drunk dude, his name is Marvin. I get my hair cut on Saturdays, this has gone on for years and I've never seen this dude except during the weekdays. So he pops up for the 1st time that I've seen at 10am. He is already drunk and ready to skool us and kick out some wisdom. Please forgive me for the lack of explanation on certain topics but I was actually in the chair at the time and couldn't jot down notes in my iPhone quickly enough with my 1 hand.

Conspicuous and electro magnetism were his 1st topics of discussion. Marvin then went on to say that he was not sure at what level he should come at us at. LOL He went on to tell us that there are 7 days in a year..according to Rome! LOL. Of course someone stated that he was wrong and that there are 365 but if you listen to his play on words, he is in fact correct. There are only 7 days...technically. Monday, Tuesday, Wed, Thurs, Fi, Sat, Sun. Those are the 7 days. LOL Good stuff. I don't know about the "according to Rome" part.

The next topic was the meaning of "exemplify". Marvin told us that that exemplify means to simply "set it off"... Exuberant means that you are top of the line and he no longer says the word hospital, he has done us all a favor and shortened it to spittle (1 letter and syllable short, how nice).

After a while Marvin started to became a bit agitated and stated that "just because yall see me with this oil lamp doesn't mean I dont know nothing...". An oil lamp is a 40, I never knew that until Sat.

The next topic of conversation was the word "cock". Marvin went on a rant about how a cock is a male chikin and that why in the world do men ask a woman for some cock. Marvin: "A cock is a d@mn rooster. I tell a woman I want some *****".

I swear I'm not making this stuff up.

The last topic of discussion was his lack of a cell phone. He stated that he doesn't need a cell because he's an an actor and not a producer. I have no clue what that meant. He also stated that if he had a cell and his woman called, he'd have no love for her and he's simply tell her to "be butterball" (when he gets home) and he'd hang up on her.

WOW!

I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.