Oh $h*T! (pun intended)

There has to be a point in time where you just let things go. At some point after your boyfriend has banged you in your eye for the 15th time, you have to realize that maybe you need to let him go. Or when your g/f has screwed another one of your homeboys, maybe you need to cut that loose. Dropping that french fry inbetween the center console and your seat...after about 10 seconds of hunting for it, just let it go.

There has to be a point in which your personal device hits certain public areas that you just have to let it go. If your cell phone has slipped from between your greasy cheek and that silk shirt that you have on and fallen onto the bathroom floor of that Mc Donalds that you can't seem to stop visiting... Stop and reflect at how many people have peed on that floor and then reflect on how much that phone cost and make a judgment call. Who knows...maybe it won't bother you at all because you don't wash your hands anyway and pee is just water, right...right??

There's a bit of a difference between in the areas surrounding the public bathroom stall, lets list them in order from least worst to the worst.

1. The floor, in front of the toilet.
2. The floor, at the base of the toilet.
3. The floor and to the sides of the toilet.
4. The floor and behind the toilet. (This is dangerous because you're getting mighty close to touching that stained porcelain...)
5. Bouncing off the seat into areas #1-#4.
6. The area where the hinge of the toilet seat is...where they don't clean at all...
7. In the toilet...

If your phone is -$100 you need to go no higher than #2 if your phone has fallen.
If your phone is $100+ then maybe you can scoot up to #3.
If your phone is $200+ and relatively new, then #5 is your limit.
If your 14, your phone is $300+ and your parents just got it for you, you better fish that mofo out. LOL

Dag...I haven't even touched on the letter yet. Does anyone listen to Steve Harvey in the morning and how he dissects letters? Let's dissect this letter...

- Obviously this lady was talking on her cell phone while using the toilet.
- Cell phones will float but yet hers is lodged into the toilet which means that she flushed the toilet in hopes that when the water disappeared she could quickly reach in and grab the phone with minimal splash damage from the poop water. She failed at this... In her desperate attempt to retrieve the unit, the water was too strong and sucked the water back in.
- This lady has issues with closure. She needs to know when something is over, regardless of all the glaringly HUGE evidence that this situation is at its end.

But, she is awesome for putting her note into a protective sleeve.


I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.